My New Favorite Person

by Gabe Berman
Gabe is the author of Live Like a Fruit Fly

Someone must have sat down with Michele Bachmann to have a strategy session about the 2012 electoral math and this person is my new favorite person. The conversation had to have gone something like this:

Michele, you know you need 270 right? California has 55 and you can completely forget about them. New York has 29 and you’ve heard the expression when pigs fly?

I wouldn’t hold your breath with Colorado, Connecticut, Delaware, DC, Florida, Hawaii, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Maine, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, New Mexico, North Carolina, Ohio, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, Vermont, Washington and Wisconsin.

Michele, regardless of what the media is saying to stir the pot in efforts to sell newspapers, beating the incumbent Barack Obama is a statistical improbability of the highest order. But remember, math is a deceptive liberal device to keep Christ out of Christmas. I think you should run.

By: Gabe Berman

Gabe Berman is a native New Yorker who settled in South Florida after graduating from the University of Miami. An epiphany, a passion, and a trail of breadcrumbs led him out of Corporate America and into the career he was meant for. After eight years of writing columns for the Miami Herald, his book - Live Like A Fruit Fly - was published by HCI Books and subsequently endorsed by Deepak Chopra. His second book, The Complete B.S. Free and Totally Tested Writing Guide, helps artists find their voice and his latest work, Where Is God When Our Loved Ones Get Sick?, uncovers the answer to this haunting question.