Trump Steaks® failed, but Trump Heroin a hit in Florida

Mind you, it was not an authorized use of the Trump brand name, but…

Heroin, like cocaine and marijuana, seems to inspire an endless supply of monikers once the drug hits the streets.

In case you needed a refresher, there’s “dope,” “smack,” “China white,” “brown sugar,” “Mexican mud,” “black tar,” “horse,” “snowball,” and “Big H,” just to name a few.

Florida law enforcement officials announced this week that there’s a new name for the deadly drug: “Donald Trump.”

After a six-month investigation into local drug dealing, the Hernando County Sheriff’s Office last month confiscated 5,500 heroin packages, some of which included an image of the president’s face and name, according to NBC affiliate WFLA.

Florida Attorney General Pam Bondi, addressing the media at the Hernando County Emergency Operations Center on Friday, was not amused, according to the Tampa Bay Times.

“All I want to say to this drug dealer is, ‘Big mistake by putting the president’s picture on this,’ ” said Bondi. “Big mistake. Because he is going to be our most fierce advocate in taking this junk off of our streets. Can you believe this? Big mistake.”

No. “Yuuuuge mistake.” The dealer should’ve paid that licensing fee!

And did you notice who was doing the talking?

Bondi found herself at the center of a controversy during the presidential campaign last year, when it emerged that Trump had failed to disclose an improper $25,000 contribution to a political group connected to the Florida Republican, who was at the time considering whether to open a fraud investigation against Trump University.

The donation, made in 2013 by the Donald J. Trump Foundation, violated federal rules that prohibit charities from donating to political candidates, The Washington Post reported in September. Trump and his team also failed to disclose the gift to the Internal Revenue Service, instead reporting that the donation was given to an unrelated group with a similar name — effectively obscuring the contribution.

Trump brushed off questions about the donation in September, saying: “I’ve just known Pam Bondi for years. I have a lot of respect for her. Never spoke to her about that at all. And just have a lot of respect for her as a person. And she has done an amazing job as the attorney general of Florida. She is very popular.”

So was Eva Perón.

By: dave-dr-gonzo

David Hirsch, a.k.a. Dave "Doctor" Gonzo*, is a renegade record producer, video producer, writer, reformed corporate shill, and still-registered lobbyist for non-one-percenter performing artists and musicians. He lives in a heavily fortified compound in one of Manhattan's less trendy neighborhoods.

* Hirsch is the third person to use the pseudonym, a not-so-veiled tribute to journalist and author Hunter S. Thompson, with the permission of his predecessors Gene Gaudette of American Politics Journal (currently webmaster and chief bottlewasher at Liberaland) and Stephen Meese at Smashmouth Politics.