Phil Robertson offers to baptize Trump so we ‘have God on our side’

Posted by | September 12, 2016 13:40 | Filed under: Politics Religion

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The Duck Dynasty star says he told Donald Trump he’d baptize him.

In a speech to the Values Voter Summit on Saturday, reality TV star Phil Robertson recounted a meeting with Donald Trump in which he told the GOP presidential nominee that he would baptize him on camera to get “God on our side.”

“If you really want to see something wild, film it, Donald, film me baptizing you,” the Duck Dynasty patriarch recalled telling Trump. “The left-wingers will literally go crazy and the evangelicals will swarm you like a mighty thrall because then we would know we have God on our side.”

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Copyright 2016 Liberaland
By: Alan

Alan Colmes is the publisher of Liberaland.

64 responses to Phil Robertson offers to baptize Trump so we ‘have God on our side’

  1. William September 12th, 2016 at 15:54

    If acting stupid and shooting ducks makes you some sort of holy man, then Elmer Fudd should be the *+cking Pope by now.

    • whatthe46 September 12th, 2016 at 16:58

      You guys are on a roll today. Lmao!!!

    • amersham1046 September 12th, 2016 at 18:28

      Collander for a hat , makes them Pastafarians , they worship the Flying Spaghetti Monster

    • bpollen September 13th, 2016 at 02:04

      Weirdest group sex scene I could imagine… well, they could have a saddle and Crisco….

      • William September 13th, 2016 at 08:39

        Yeah, thanks for the cyber ipecac. The crazy thing is the Goobers don’t understand that these clowns were country club, golf shirt republicans who went Z Z top/Bible thumper, swamp-billy for a TV gig.

        • bpollen September 14th, 2016 at 04:35

          About the only thing I am apt to take at face value on TV is the disclaimer they run before infomercials. But your results may vary.

  2. Hirightnow September 12th, 2016 at 17:44

    13 Then Donald came from Florida to the Hudson to be baptized by Phil.
    14 But Phil tried to deter him, saying, “I need to be hired by you, and perhaps made a paid advisor and do you come to me?”
    15 Donald replied, “Let it be so now; it is proper for us to do this to fulfill all foolishness.” Then Phil consented.
    16 As soon as Donald was baptized, he went up out of the Hudson. At that moment Trump Tower was opened, and he saw the Spirit of Giuliani descending like a pigeon and alighting on him.
    17 And a voice from the 58th floor said, “This guy is Yuge!, He’s the best! Nine eleven!”

    • Gary Parillo September 12th, 2016 at 20:40

      LOL.This is the literal word and a curse on anyone who tries to change these words.

  3. pinballsdoll September 12th, 2016 at 17:51

    Stupid ass doesn’t realize he’s a tv character

  4. Gary Parillo September 12th, 2016 at 21:57

    My post has disappeared again.Why????

    • whatthe46 September 12th, 2016 at 22:03

      again? that’s got to be seriously annoying. i’m annoyed that the site on the cell is a serious irritant. have you seen it? it’s not friendly at all right now.

      • Gary Parillo September 12th, 2016 at 22:17

        Yes,it is seriously annoying! Now its came up again.Usually after I post something about this diappearing magical act it shows up again.Sorry I dont know how to do the cell thing.Im really a dunce with this technology.Trying to learn,but its difficult for my old brain.

        • whatthe46 September 12th, 2016 at 22:22

          well, i mean just going on the internet using your cell phone. don’t worry about the old thing, i’m still trying to figure out twitter. lol

          • Gary Parillo September 12th, 2016 at 23:13

            Lol on twitter.I had help with twitter training.It took me a while to figure out the way it jumps around so fast.Sent twitters to the wrong people at first,and made them as confused as me.I think I have it down to a passable level now.Ive also been trying to figure out how to share links,but keep forgetting the procedure and messed that up.I really wish the tech geniuses that invent these things would make one for people over 60.Something where you only need to press like one or two buttons in order to complete a procedure.Sorry bout the rant,but many older people are being left out.

            • whatthe46 September 12th, 2016 at 23:20

              i loved the rant, so no worries. oh and i’ve messed on it too. i’m just figuring some stuff out. trial and error. they could at least post a “twitter for dummies” category so it wouldn’t be so difficult. and as for the it being fast and jumping around, a few hours after i got the account all these tweets started popping up and i’m thinking WTH.

              • Gary Parillo September 12th, 2016 at 23:23

                Lol.I sent one or two to the wrong person once,and he tweeted back asking why I was harassing him.How special.My first twitter fight and I wasnt even sure why?

                • whatthe46 September 12th, 2016 at 23:30

                  dying laughing.

                • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 01:01

                  Gary, here is a site that Anomaly just gave me to help you and i out:
                  Tweetdeck.com

                  • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 01:17

                    Thanks,I will check it out. (If it doesn’t vanish)

                    • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 01:29

                      i’ll check it out tomorrow. not about to train my brain for that tonight.

      • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 00:12

        My posts just vanished again,including latest replys to you and bpollen.Very annoying.Maybe Alan does it to pull pranks for entertainment.

        • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 00:17

          i see your post to me.

      • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 00:24

        I just read your reply on my notifications,but your last post and all mine are still absent from this site.Very,Very frking bizarre.They may all pop up again later, but I cant see any of them now.

        • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 00:45

          weird because i see all of our post back and forth.

  5. bpollen September 12th, 2016 at 22:42

    When did a duck-call maker turn into a straight conduit to God? And why weren’t we told?

    • Gary Parillo September 12th, 2016 at 23:18

      I think it was after the big foot call maker sinned,so god needed a replacement conduit.These things are only revealed through fasting and prayer.

      • bpollen September 12th, 2016 at 23:30

        Well, that’s why I didn’t know. I eat and my praying consists of “Oh gawd oh gawd oh gawd…”

        • whatthe46 September 12th, 2016 at 23:34

          stupid. LMAO!!!!

          • Gary Parillo September 12th, 2016 at 23:57

            What is lmao?

            • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 00:01

              laughing my ass off.

              • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 00:03

                LMAO. I think?

                • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 00:16

                  ROTFLMFAO!!!
                  here’s a clue

                  • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 00:30

                    Lol,but Im still clueless.My posts and yours just popped up again.Weird!

                    • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 00:40

                      Rolling On The Floor Lauging My Fk’n Ass Off.
                      R O T F L M F A O

                    • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 01:05

                      If you add any more letters to that, i will never figure it out.

                    • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 01:12

                      laughing. that’s so cute. i’m sorry i had to say cute. my son says i embarrass him when i call his friends cars cute. LOLOLOL

                    • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 01:43

                      Take it from someone who was once a son,never use the word, “cute” in front of your sons friends.You’ll never know the ribbing they give him once you’ve left the room.

                    • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 01:44

                      got it. lol

                    • bpollen September 13th, 2016 at 02:03

                      Here’s a reference to some of the internet lingo – it’s usually just an acronym (WTF – What The F*ck, BRB – Be Right Back, and so on)

                    • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 02:59

                      THC (thanks helps clarify).

                    • bpollen September 13th, 2016 at 03:46

                      By George, I think he’s got it!

        • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 00:07

          Mine has consisted alot lately of,GD,Gd,Gd.But I think he (orshe,or it) knows I’m not directing at him (or he,or she,or it)

          • bpollen September 13th, 2016 at 01:13

            I guess I didn’t think of that as prayer… I’m not feeling particularly spiritual when I’m saying it. I just don’t understand religion.

            • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 01:34

              bpollen, you know when i said “stupid. LMAO!!!!” that was a loving post right?

              • bpollen September 13th, 2016 at 02:00

                Sorry, didn’t see it. For some reason Disqus didn’t show it to me. I expect your posts to me to be well-meant. I figure if you wanted to let me know you had a problem with my comments, you are perfectly capable of doing so. (I’ve seen you in action against the trolls, after all!)

                • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 02:21

                  ahhhh i’m a nice person all the time.

                • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 02:25

                  goodnight my friend. until tomorrow, take care ok.

            • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 01:38

              I don’t think god even understands religion.

              • bpollen September 13th, 2016 at 02:06

                I did reply to your post here, but I can’t find it.

                Too bad. I was hysterical.

                (Now it will show up and prove that it was just a stupid joke…)

              • bpollen September 13th, 2016 at 02:11

                “OMF me, look at what these dumb-ass humans are doing now!”

                • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 02:20

                  ahahahahahahahahha

  6. Warman1138 September 13th, 2016 at 00:28

    Robertson probably thinks Hanna Barbera makes documentaries and considers Elmer Fudd a role model.

    • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 00:35

      I think his long beard has went to his head and he thinks of himself as a moses type figure.Im sure there is some mental disorder that would confirm that,but can’t think what it would be at the moment.

      • (((John_St_John))) September 13th, 2016 at 22:08

        Rectal defilade.

        • Gary Parillo September 13th, 2016 at 23:25

          I couldn’t find defilade in my dictionary,but discovered that old saying is true,that “a picture is worth a thousand words” clicking on view explained the condition very well.Might be well his head is ##@# that he also suffers from delusions of grandeur.

  7. 80HD September 13th, 2016 at 00:51

    “Somebody has poisoned the water hole”
    Nah Trumps hair just turned it into Flint Michigan.

  8. Ed VanDyke September 13th, 2016 at 01:14

    C’mon fundamentalists! Weren’t you listening when Drumpf said “I’m really rich.”?? Obviously he is more favored by God. That proves it, right? ;)

    • William September 13th, 2016 at 01:20

      Well you know. Anyone who subscribes to that biblical passage about it being easier to get a camel through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to get to heaven, simply doesn’t understand the kick ass blender Donalds money can buy.

      • whatthe46 September 13th, 2016 at 01:36

        no don’t come up. no no no no….

    • Bunya September 13th, 2016 at 14:08

      Well, YEAH! One of the richest, tax exempt corporations in the world is the Catholic church – and we all know how much God favors them. “Blessed are the rich, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. All others will be send to a place of perpetual fire beneath the earth where they will be punished after death.”

      • Ed VanDyke September 13th, 2016 at 14:15

        Capitalism + Calvinism = “There is only one God, and Dollar is His prophet”…

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