Evangelicals ‘lay hands’ on Trump to protect him from satanic attack
Donald Trump is so lucky to have the religious right with him.
Click here for reuse options!Appearing at an Christian gathering in Cleveland on Wednesday, GOP presidential nominee Donald Trump was put under the protection of God by a bevy of evangelicals after the host of the conference said the New York businessman needed to be protected from a “concentrated Satanic attack.”
After Trump addressed a few African-American pastors and a whole lot of white people at the Midwest Vision and Values Pastors Leadership Conference, pro-Trump pastor and co-host of the event, Darrell Scott, took the mic.
Speaking to the attendees, Scott claimed that a “nationally known” — but unidentified — preacher had forewarned Trump “that if you choose to run for president, there’s going to be a concentrated Satanic attack against you.”
Copyright 2016 Liberaland
Long Tom September 21st, 2016 at 18:38
A “concentrated satanic attack” is never quite as good as a fresh-squeezed satanic attack.
Gary Parillo September 21st, 2016 at 21:30
lol- keep it an all natural attack
Hirightnow September 22nd, 2016 at 00:11
I prefer my Satanic attacks to be “free-range”, you know; fewer chemicals.
Jungle_Bhoy September 21st, 2016 at 18:39
What a complete d*ckhead!
Suzanne McFly September 21st, 2016 at 18:39
Well Lucifer lived in Heaven once so it seems again he is crossing the border.
amersham1046 September 21st, 2016 at 18:45
Sorry guys, God can’t vote (no fixed address)
Dwendt44 September 21st, 2016 at 18:47
that he doesn’t exist at all also affects the election.
StoneyCurtisll September 21st, 2016 at 20:14
Absolutely~!
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 19:20
… https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/18ebb4886db1952705164a85988cc110ce5ddb70bdbea15dac29ebc00e328b95.jpg
Mike N. September 21st, 2016 at 19:24
It boggles my mind that any evangelical can somehow rationalize voting for Trump. I mean, the thrice-married Trump called pregnancy an “inconvenience” and described avoiding STDs while sleeping around as “his Vietnam”. Seriously, why is that evangelicals can’t vote for someone with a D after their name?
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 19:38
don’t forget the accusations of raping a child: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-bloom/why-the-new-child-rape-ca_b_10619944.html
Lyndia September 21st, 2016 at 19:33
It is no wonder that people are turning away from organized religion. If you place your hands on someone and pray about whatever, that is not going to make a person safe, however, if that is what you believe, go right ahead with that stupid, crazy, chit.
Hirightnow September 21st, 2016 at 19:53
Whether it’s presidential candidates, or somebody’s child, these folks need to stop with the “laying on of hands”…
Wonder if any of them prayed and fasted before they did this magical ceremony, which even the bible warns has dangers…
StoneyCurtisll September 21st, 2016 at 20:10
I have to wonder how large the check was that Trump gave to “pastor Darrel Scott’s” ‘ministry”…
TiredOldGuy September 21st, 2016 at 20:19
… from the Trump charity foundation.
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 20:25
BOOM!!!!
StoneyCurtisll September 21st, 2016 at 20:26
(other peoples money)..:)
StoneyCurtisll September 21st, 2016 at 20:12
I couldn’t help but notice that Don King, (two murders) was standing along side the Con-men Trump and Darrel Scott…
StoneyCurtisll September 21st, 2016 at 20:15
This is a good one~!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7d2ayLb2lg
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 20:33
keep ’em coming Stoney… oh and FDT!!!
StoneyCurtisll September 21st, 2016 at 20:55
high five~!
Red Mann September 21st, 2016 at 23:02
Holy shite, why don’t you just say what you mean, Keith. A brilliant commentary on a useless POS, a truly evil man who is, incredibly, supported by millions of deranged Americans, supported by pontificating, hypocritical religious freaks and not being called to task by the MSM. What a sick f*cking country we have become.
Hirightnow September 21st, 2016 at 23:58
Love me some Keith.
jybarz September 21st, 2016 at 21:04
Satan incarnate: Trump the little fingered, orange-utan, con-man!
Buford2k11 September 21st, 2016 at 21:13
ummm…It is too little too late…Mammon got his guy…
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 22:11
if someone touched me talking about laying hands, i’d pop the hell out of ’em. that’s just fricken creepy.
Gary Parillo September 22nd, 2016 at 01:03
Then you best stay away from Pentecostal churches.That would probably only be misdemeanor battery though,and a lotta fun to watch.
robert September 21st, 2016 at 21:16
This would be a good time to slap Donald or clock him while his eyes were closed
See..the devil got you 👊
Hirightnow September 21st, 2016 at 23:46
Lord, gonna {smack} DRIVE them demons right outta this poor soul!
katkelly57 September 21st, 2016 at 22:22
Christ on a bike!
What the hell were these folks thinking??!??!?
I’m surprised they didn’t spontaneously combust when the touched him….or get a bad case of cooties.
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 23:02
if they were really serious and truly believed, then why didn’t they step into a vat full of rattle snakes. if they don’t get bitten or die, then i’ll believe in “laying hands on.” until then, they are full of sh!t!
katkelly57 September 21st, 2016 at 23:05
I can smell ’em too.
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 23:06
lol
bpollen September 22nd, 2016 at 04:43
Jesus in a jalopy! Messiah on a Moto Guzzi! Savior on a skateboard!
.
…Christ on a crossbow! From my easter season arsenal:
.
https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/912f1af5e8a963f2ee8d02b99fdb5d9ccab84fda224ccd21e9f042ed06583921.gif
whatthe46 September 22nd, 2016 at 04:51
OMG! i’m going to hell for laughing huh?
bpollen September 22nd, 2016 at 04:55
No, Gawd and his illegitimate son Jebus have them some FINE senses of humor. Look at all the Republicans who they told that THEY were the candidate that had divine backing. Or telling Jim Bakker “If you build a water-slide, we WILL come!”
whatthe46 September 22nd, 2016 at 04:59
point well made. lol
katkelly57 September 22nd, 2016 at 13:36
Love it…some of the bestest jokes about Jaysus I learned in Caflik school.
What did Jesus tell his boyz when he was on the cross?
“None of you bastards better eat my eggs, I’ll be back on Sunday.”
What did he tell his mother from the cross?
“Hey Ma, I can see our house from here!”
bpollen September 22nd, 2016 at 14:43
You may have seen me tell this one before, but it’s my simplest, and least offensive Christianity joke:
Jesus stands with the fallen woman and says “Let he who is without sin cast the first stone!” Out of the crowd flies a huge rock, hitting the fallen woman and dropping her to the ground. Jesus looks out at the crowd and says “Mom, stop bothering me at work!”
katkelly57 September 22nd, 2016 at 18:29
Oldie but still funny.
bpollen September 23rd, 2016 at 03:03
I have another clean, non-offensive one, but it’s long and convoluted and I’m too damn lazy. But both the last one and the one I’m too lazy for were told to me by a drunken priest.
katkelly57 September 23rd, 2016 at 13:19
Was he my Irish uncle?
Like they say…there’s only 3 kinds of Irish…a drunk, a priest and a drunken priest….stereotypes all ovah da place!
bpollen September 23rd, 2016 at 14:57
My early childhood in Catholicism included Weekend Drunken Priest and Low Stakes Poker nights… It’s like with the Wizard of Oz, once you see behind the curtain, the illusion of greatness looks kinda pitiful. If you are a practicing Catholic, I’m sorry if my position is offensive, but I am a recovering Catholic.
katkelly57 September 23rd, 2016 at 16:38
Oh no there is no offense taken, I am def. a recovering Caflik as well…I liken it to the 12 step program…instead it’s 12 staircases.
:p
bpollen September 24th, 2016 at 01:56
Well, the Catholic Church has one heck of a conversion program – unfortunately for them, it converts people to EX-Catholics.
katkelly57 September 24th, 2016 at 18:22
Even after all these years, there are many things that remain w/me….rituals, prayers, just little things.
I suppose when you’re born into a Catholic family you’re kinda doomed in a way..(not sure doomed is the correct word)….from the first time you’re brought in for baptism till whenever you leave on your own (or by death), it’s in your spiritual DNA.
Did you as a kid do the alternate signing of the cross on yourself?
Spectacles, testicles, watch, wallet.
bpollen September 24th, 2016 at 18:31
I learned it as wallet and watch, but your version makes more sense since I’m a right-hander. Maybe the kid who taught me was a lefty?
Bunya September 22nd, 2016 at 14:04
LOL! That’s a good one!
Red Mann September 21st, 2016 at 23:09
Don’t forget he has Ted Nugent who has also called for Hillary Clinton’s death, on one of his campaign ads. There has never been such a pathetic sleaze bag, a pustulent carbunkle, an oozing cancerous sore running for the office of the President of the United States. The PRESIDENT of the United F*cking States for f*ck sake. What is wrong with these people,are they f*cking pod people, maybe chemtrails ARE real and the Repubs have turned so many people into brain dead zombies. “Truuump, Truuump, Truuump!”
localhistorywriter September 21st, 2016 at 23:13
You look like Mammy Yokum. Or her feces.
Hideous old stinking trailer trash,
full of dingleberries.
Bet your little old shriveled up weenie hasn’t been hard since Roosevelt (Teddy) was president.
Go crawl into your grave and die, granny, you’re the scum of the nursing home.
Red Mann September 21st, 2016 at 23:19
Go back to The Stream, you useless, infantile troll, You are showing the true face of extreme Christianity.
Note: this slimebag troll has followed me from this thread where they are freaking out over what they call “Child Sacrifices”.
https://stream.org/euthanasia-minors-chemically-castrated-8-year-olds-child-sacrifice-begun-west/#comment-2909438504
Hirightnow September 22nd, 2016 at 00:06
Careful with that link, Eugene; I just got a whole lotta history I’m not sure I want from clicking it.
bpollen September 22nd, 2016 at 04:38
Meh… close enough for government work:
.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WVCKpkkP-z4
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 23:22
https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/1e926b29e4ee7eba5108ab3a74874810780a58e5cd6c3745e9183ce8d237a6f7.jpg
you big dumbass, poorly educated moron!
Hirightnow September 21st, 2016 at 23:40
Oh, hello. Let me introduce myself; My name here is “Hirightnow”, and I’m a moderator at alan.com.
This means that I’m charged with keeping these threads free of garbage like what you just posted.
Now, you can take this any way you want to, Mark, and even brag to your buddies that your “truth” was too much for those wuss libs over at that commie site, but your unprovoked attack on a person posting here has caused you to lose posting privileges. You may, certainly, appeal to Mr. Colmes, the site’s owner, possibly claiming you posted nothing wrong. That’s, of course, your prerogative.
But I wouldn’t waste my time, because I take screenshots.
(Also, congratulations on a human spending more than 30 seconds dismissing you…I’m sure that’s a record for you.)
Hirightnow September 21st, 2016 at 23:45
(I love my job…)
whatthe46 September 21st, 2016 at 23:48
and i heart you.
Hirightnow September 21st, 2016 at 23:48
:)
Carla Akins September 22nd, 2016 at 04:13
IKR? I completely get that “absolute power” quote now. :-)
whatthe46 September 22nd, 2016 at 04:26
y’all funny
whatthe46 September 22nd, 2016 at 04:27
one day. one of these, well, years, one of these years. lol
Bunya September 22nd, 2016 at 14:02
I have a bone to pick with you, Mr. Hirightnow. When you delete the stupid posts before I have a chance to read them, it deprives me of the very satisfaction I get from making fun of them.
William September 22nd, 2016 at 14:09
Exactly. Banishing a clown to troll-hell is all well and good but at least they should leave the good stuff up for a while. https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/d1c478688f4c1436223516d84c6764d991ae530a45943f19dde8883d307fb020.jpg
Hirightnow September 22nd, 2016 at 14:53
If it’s halfway original, or at least contains something more than an insult, I will.
This was just some 7th grader releasing his pent up frustrations.
(Image of post in reply to Bunya above)
William September 23rd, 2016 at 09:56
thanks.
William September 23rd, 2016 at 10:05
Hmmmmm. Two days ago on a Facebook site that praised the popularity of our first lady, a thirteen year old chimed in and wrote that he couldn’t tell the difference between Michelle Obama and Ru Paul. I of course responded by suggesting he could reduce his confusion if he would simply stop googling photos of transvestites. The ensuing sh*tstorm was delightful. I wonder if that same kid followed me here?
Hirightnow September 23rd, 2016 at 11:33
That sounds friggin’ hilarious…
Hirightnow September 22nd, 2016 at 14:38
http://imgur.com/kzAcnGN
Bunya September 22nd, 2016 at 14:48
I can see why you deleted that post. He’s just another adolescent troll who has no political opinion, but enjoys posting trash just to read what he wrote.
fahvel September 22nd, 2016 at 03:20
Brilliant – pure poetry!!!!!
whatthe46 September 22nd, 2016 at 03:26
hey you. how have you been?
bpollen September 22nd, 2016 at 04:49
You mean chemtrails aren’t referring to how you perceive motion while tripping?
dogsRgoodpeople September 22nd, 2016 at 06:34
yes,those are real ,no wait …………………………
bpollen September 22nd, 2016 at 06:48
The colors, man, look at all the colors! I call that one purpleen!
alpacadaddy September 21st, 2016 at 23:34
OK, this is truly weird, like Jerry Springer off-the-rails… and Dump, pretending he feels the calling (of the bat-sh!t crazy!) with his TV serious-frown on, I’m not sure whether he’s concerned over humanoid-to-deity communication, or maybe he’s just constipated!
Gary Parillo September 22nd, 2016 at 00:56
Look carefully at his expression.He’s thinking, “don’t start laughing,don’t start laughing.In a few minutes I’ll be oughta here,don’t start laughing.”
Gary Parillo September 22nd, 2016 at 00:50
Now he will probably start speaking in tongues.Would anyone notice?
Packy East September 22nd, 2016 at 01:30
Notice they do not touch Trump’s head, which true Christians would do! Wonder if Donald Trump (R) even knows the even Jesus Christ “PAID” Tax (Matthew 17: 24-27). # Where is Melania
whatthe46 September 22nd, 2016 at 01:45
that’s because i was staged. he told them, “well we’re gonna do this hand laying thing right? so, just don’t touch the animi… i mean the hair. okay.”
fahvel September 22nd, 2016 at 03:18
and what do you know – the evangelical satanists touched the bstard and now all will boil in the chamber pot of hell.
whatthe46 September 22nd, 2016 at 03:26
let us pray!!!