NSFW: ‘Would Someone Please Send Tom Cotton A…’
[He] claimed that recent statements made by a State Department spokesman are “worrisome” because they undermine foreign officials currently in negotiations, Steve Benen reports.
Cotton was not speaking about President Obama’s negotiations, however, but of Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s attempt to form a coalition government.
Earlier that day, State Department spokesman Jen Psaki told reporters that the administration is “currently evaluating our approach” to the recently reelected Netanyahu, a statement that Cotton found “worrisome.”
You know what’s more worrisome? A press corps that takes this Teawinger seriously.
I first got wind of this story when a friend forwarded it to me by e-mail with the subject, “Would Someone Please Send Tom Cotton A Big Bag Of Dicks??”
Well, The Doc has good news: you can now do just that – and anonymously, to boot!
[I]t seems that a guy known by the alias “Dick Richards”… just started an online service that makes the insult a little bit sweeter.
The website is called Dicks By Mail, and its primary purpose is to let people ship bags of gummy penises to their enemies. Like Ship Your Enemies Glitter, but with dicks. Richards outlined his vision for the service on the site, where he also notes that this is a prank (just in case that wasn’t already clear):
We have a long history of sending dicks to people. Starting in middle school with those folded notes, that unfold to a big veiny cock. Moving to texting ’8===D’ to random people in high school all the way to snapchatting below the belt pics to ladies from the bar/church. But now it’s on to bigger and better things; now it’s on to Dicks by Mail. […]
This site was created to put a smile on peoples faces [sic]. It’s not meant to be a threat or a way to bully. If you are sending this with the intent to ruin someones day [sic], then maybe its you who needs to eat a bag of dicks [sic]
The whole package costs $15 (including shipping) and includes a 5-oz. bag of candy phalluses along with a single note that reads, “EAT A BAG OF DICKS.”
Because it’s the thought that counts.
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Copyright 2015 Liberaland
By: dave-dr-gonzo
David Hirsch, a.k.a. Dave "Doctor" Gonzo*, is a renegade record producer, video producer, writer, reformed corporate shill, and still-registered lobbyist for non-one-percenter performing artists and musicians. He lives in a heavily fortified compound in one of Manhattan's less trendy neighborhoods.
* Hirsch is the third person to use the pseudonym, a not-so-veiled tribute to journalist and author Hunter S. Thompson, with the permission of his predecessors Gene Gaudette of American Politics Journal (currently webmaster and chief bottlewasher at Liberaland) and Stephen Meese at Smashmouth Politics.
7 responses to NSFW: ‘Would Someone Please Send Tom Cotton A…’
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Warman1138 March 21st, 2015 at 03:10
Old Cotton could stuff a lot of those everywhere.
rg9rts March 21st, 2015 at 04:01
Get lemons…make lemonade
bluejayray March 21st, 2015 at 11:49
Well, at least there’s no side boobs involved. I hope this is the extent of today’s penis stories.
Dwendt44 March 21st, 2015 at 11:59
The only ‘boob’ is Cotton himself.
cecilia March 21st, 2015 at 12:56
LOL
this is why I love America
Snick1946 March 21st, 2015 at 13:01
My first impression of Cotton was that he is an ignorant little dweeb with a huge attitude. Nothing from him since has changed that impression.
Dcbos March 21st, 2015 at 16:32
Now a Rich one Addelson has adopted him; bought and paid for PRO Israeli congress person