Go Kiss My Asteroid!
The universe is everything there is – all the planets, stars and galaxies (at least 100 billion of them) and all the matter and energy that ever existed. The parts we can see through our most powerful telescopes suggest it is about 28 billion light years in diameter. In fact, it is much larger than that. Since the universe has been expanding since the Big Bang, which took place about 13.8 billion years ago, the universe is at least 92 billion light years in diameter. It may be even larger than that. It may be infinite. Or there may be multiple universes, with new ones forming every nanosecond. So why am I telling you this?
I am telling you this because every day I receive at least one Facebook message from some New Age ninny who tells me the universe will bless me with everything I need. I hate to be the bearer of bad news but that’s just not true. The fact is, the universe is doing its best to kill us.
Did the universe give the dinosaurs everything they needed? No. It gave them an asteroid. Scientists estimate there are at least 800 potentially hazardous asteroids that could do the same thing to us.
There are comets – huge balls of rock and ice that orbit our sun. Some of them cross the Earth’s orbit. One of them could have our number on it.
There are solar flares that could, just possibly, disable the power grid for weeks, months or even years. That would be fun.
There are supernovae, exploding stars expanding to millions of times their normal size, giving off billions of times their normal radiation.
Then there are gamma ray bursts. They’re the most luminous events known in the universe. A gamma ray burst lasts only a few seconds to a few minutes but can give off as much energy as a billion trillion suns. A gamma ray burst anywhere in our part of the galaxy could produce enough radiation to destroy all life on earth.
Then there is the temperature of the universe. It ranges from about 27 million degrees on the trillions of stars like our sun to absolute zero (minus 459.67° Fahrenheit).
Closer to home, our little blue planet gives us earthquakes, hurricanes, tornadoes, tsunamis, volcanoes and the occasional plague and mutant super virus. So the next time some self-proclaimed psychic, medium or other practitioner of New Age nuttery tells you the universe will give you everything you need, tell them to go kiss your asteroid.
P.S. The Tea Party, Dick Cheney and assorted other American wingnuts are a far greater threat to our well-being than comets, asteroids and gamma ray bursts.
Click here for reuse options!Copyright 2014 Liberaland
By: Dave
Dave is the webmaster of StrangerAmerica.com, a website devoted to the greatness that is Dick Cheney.
He is also the creator of RonnieReagan.com, a site devoted to a man considered by some to have been one of the better B-grade actors to portray a U.S. president.
You will find the complete writings of Dave at LookAmerica.com, including his quest for the perfect meatball and his encounters with Pat the Nazi and the Psycho Dentist.
14 responses to Go Kiss My Asteroid!
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arc99 June 26th, 2014 at 16:18
Creationists want us to believe that the earth and in fact the entire universe was created a mere 6,000 years ago.
If that were the case, then according to basic physics, nothing in the sky should be visible if it is more than 6,000 light years away. Even if the great creator threw a bunch of stuff into the cosmos tens of millions of light years from where the earth was created, none of it should be visible since the light from those objects could not reach us in 6,000 years.
Some elements in the constellation Cassiopeia are nearly 10,000 light years way. If the universe was only 6,000 years old, we should not even be able to see Cassiopeia yet. But that constellation was mapped back in the time of the ancient Greeks.
I fully support the right of people to believe in whatever they want. Personally, I believe in the laws of physics.
http://moonphases.info/about-cassiopeia.html
Being part of the first batch of constellations discovered by Greek Astronomer Ptolemy, Cassiopeia is one of the 48 original constellations found by Ptolemy that is still deemed scientifically correct of the current 88 listed in present day.
Chinese Democracy June 26th, 2014 at 16:26
Scientist have recently proven Einstein wrong
Scientists achieve reliable quantum teleportation for first time
http://goo.gl/UpxPai
arc99 June 26th, 2014 at 16:28
then the universe is 6,000 years old!!!
we owe Evangelicals an apology…
Chinese Democracy June 26th, 2014 at 16:50
lol Wonder how they picked 6000 yrs ? It seems pretty random. Sometimes I hear 3,000 I have a feeling someones abacus is missing some beads
Dwendt44 June 26th, 2014 at 17:21
Supposedly, some bishop counted backwards all the generations listed in the bible and arrived at day one was in October 4004 BC.
Given the error rate in most everything in the bible, I’m surprised even he didn’t see how idiotic that was.
Chinese Democracy June 26th, 2014 at 17:42
ya gotta have faith faith faith and suspend all critical thinking heh
arc99 June 26th, 2014 at 16:18
Creationists want us to believe that the earth and in fact the entire universe was created a mere 6,000 years ago.
If that were the case, then according to basic physics, nothing in the sky should be visible if it is more than 6,000 light years away. Even if the great creator threw a bunch of stuff into the cosmos tens of millions of light years from where the earth was created, none of it should be visible since the light from those objects could not reach us in 6,000 years.
Some elements in the constellation Cassiopeia are nearly 10,000 light years way. If the universe was only 6,000 years old, we should not even be able to see Cassiopeia yet. But that constellation was mapped back in the time of the ancient Greeks.
I fully support the right of people to believe in whatever they want. Personally, I believe in the laws of physics. According to Einstein it is not possible for anything to travel faster than the speed of light. Anything further away than the distance light can travel in 6000 years should not be visible on earth. On the other hand, we are talking about God here, so who knows.. Never mind.
http://moonphases.info/about-cassiopeia.html
Being part of the first batch of constellations discovered by Greek Astronomer Ptolemy, Cassiopeia is one of the 48 original constellations found by Ptolemy that is still deemed scientifically correct of the current 88 listed in present day.
Chinese Democracy June 26th, 2014 at 16:26
Scientist have recently proven Einstein wrong
Scientists achieve reliable quantum teleportation for first time
http://goo.gl/UpxPai
arc99 June 26th, 2014 at 16:28
then the universe is 6,000 years old!!!
we owe Evangelicals an apology…
Chinese Democracy June 26th, 2014 at 16:50
lol Wonder how they picked 6000 yrs ? It seems pretty random. Sometimes I hear 3,000 I have a feeling someones abacus is missing some beads
Dwendt44 June 26th, 2014 at 17:21
Supposedly, some bishop counted backwards all the generations listed in the bible and arrived at day one was in October 4004 BC.
Given the error rate in most everything in the bible, I’m surprised even he didn’t see how idiotic that was.
Chinese Democracy June 26th, 2014 at 17:42
ya gotta have faith faith faith and suspend all critical thinking heh
craig7120 June 26th, 2014 at 17:19
******”P.S. The Tea Party, Dick Cheney and assorted other American wingnuts are a far greater threat to our well-being than comets, asteroids and gamma ray bursts.”*****
Dude, you ain’t kidding.
Im surprised we have lasted this long, its worthy of a collective sigh of relief.
Good stuff
craig7120 June 26th, 2014 at 17:19
******”P.S. The Tea Party, Dick Cheney and assorted other American wingnuts are a far greater threat to our well-being than comets, asteroids and gamma ray bursts.”*****
Dude, you ain’t kidding.
Im surprised we have lasted this long, its worthy of a collective sigh of relief.
Good stuff